*Note: this all happened over the course of a few months starting in January 2011, so while the events are all accurate, the quotations are not verbatim. However, they are accurate in tone and meaning.
Picture it: It’s a beautiful sunny day. I’m sitting on a park bench with my boyfriend. I’m reading, he’s quietly strumming on his guitar.
I hear him say hi to someone and I look up.
and that’s when I realize my bright sunny day is about to be less sunny and more “OMFG I don’t want to deal with this asshole right now.”
Now, I happen to be reading a damn good book at the time, and I’m at a really tense scene that I would rather not be pulled away from. With most people I’d put the book down and try to participate in friendly conversation, but I tend not to extend this courtesy to my Mortal Enemies™. Especially not Nice Guy™ Mortal Enemies™. He’s kind of sort of friends with my boyfriend, mostly because my boyfriend doesn’t know when to tell people he dislikes to fuck off, so I discreetly cross my fingers and hope they’ll just talk to each other and let me read my book.
No. Such. Luck.
“Hey, whatcha readin’?”
“What’s it about?”
“Psycho Axe-Murderers who kill people who interrupt them when they’re reading.”
Mortal Enemy smiles smugly. I can hear his thoughts- what a bitch. His brain is saying. What did I ever do to her?
Well Mortal Enemy, let’s back up a few months and I’ll tell you. Might want to take a quick bathroom break. This is a long story. Continue reading